As someone who has mastered and calmed her energies throughout the past decade, I’m somewhat relieved that my sexual energies have aligned in a more subdued fashion, only to allow my spiritual energies to lift itself and take itself over.
My history with sex has been an interesting one all my life. I grew up fearing it like a paranoid fool, part in parcel due to my hypochondria and my mother’s demands that I stay away from this as a teen. Then I eased off of that fear relationship with it due to my seizures, which worsened unfortunately throughout the years. It was a blessing in disguise though, I realized. I went from being seriously worried that all guys were horny bastards, that masturbation had bad health effects, to releasing that and reaching a state of indifference. It was something that actually helped bring me to a state of spiritual wellness and released my sexual fear altogether. My seizures from my epilepsy gave me the keys to open up the doors to namaste in a way.
Ironically, even if I have less of a sexual charge and urge than I did back in perhaps my preteen days when I masturbated to Britney Spears’ One More Time Video (that was the time in my life when I could truly recall that horny side of me), I still come into contact with sex. I’ve had a wild history with sex my whole life. I dated guys on and off once I graduated highschool and moved out of my strict traditional Chinese household. I went wild with looking for guys to hook up with. I had to bookmark and label the Okcupid guys I had dates with. And yes, naturally, I ended up at a massage parlor too in order to sort of release my lingering sexual trauma as well.
This was a ravaging way to sort of taste what sex was and what it was like with multiple guys. It was a windstorm of everything really, but it gave me a good clear picture of how complex sex really is. It also gave me a good picture that we aren’t all just primal beings looking for hookups the same way apes can easily just scurry on over to an ape of the opposite sex and just stick its private parts into theirs. If only things were that simple, right? Well, not for human beings. The reasons why one has sex with another human being is overlaid by several factors, and many things get in the way. A dick inside a pussy equals clarity and ease is never the equation. I will explain my interesting stories with sex in the coming blog entries, so feel free to stay tuned to hear the little kooky stories that I come to share!
Happy Endings 